HURRICANE SANDY IS ALL MY FAULT!

It’s kind of a standing joke between my husband and me.  If something goes wrong in the house, or with our kids, with appliances even, and I question it, he says, “Well, I don’t know what’s wrong, but I’m SURE it’s your fault!”.  He knows me!

I have a very sensitive conscience that slips easily into guilt. It doesn’t take a lot to make me feel badly about something and it’s not uncommon for me to say, “I wonder if that (what I said, or didn’t say, or what I did, or didn’t do) was my fault.”  Hence, the standing joke.

I freely admit I’m probably not really responsible for some of the things I’m perfectly willing to own.  However, just so you know, there are plenty of things I AM responsible for that I’d rather NOT own!  But, I think what happened this week was definitely MY fault!

A week ago today we got hit with what the media was calling a ”Frankenstorm” since it hit us just two days before Halloween.  And a Frankenstorm it was!  It was a perfect storm, converging three weather patterns over a area of 900 miles, and it wrought terrible destruction.  The Jersey shore, our state’s pride and joy, was, as the governor described it, “unrecognizable”.  

 One family we’ve heard about has a summer house there and they were told they would not be able to live in it for 2 years because the town’s infrastructure was wiped out.  Locally, when it was safe, my husband and I took a walk to find many downed trees and power lines and lots of people and businesses without power.  

For the last week we’ve been living without power – no heat, no electricity, all our food spoiled.  It hasn’t been bad at all really.  We’ve kind of looked at it as an adventure of sorts.  And so many are in worse straits.  Apart from losing power, all we had was a downed tree which thankfully fell across the yard and not on the house.  

So why am I taking personal responsibility for this massive storm over which I had absolutely NO control?  Because of the lesson in it that I needed to learn.  

The Lord has gifted me with a personality that enjoys its space.  I enjoy people, but being with people non-stop is exhausting for me.  Every now and then I crave solitude to recharge my batteries. I entered the fall with a full plate of ministry responsibilities – weekly teaching assignments, a video series to facilitate, work with youth.  I love doing ministry and know that the Lord has called me to teach, but I was feeling a bit overwhelmed.  When I did have some quiet time, my brain preferred to veg out – on big doses of TV, and solitaire on my computer.  

Being busy and feeling overwhelmed created my own “perfect storm”.   Winds of busyness and stress took me further and further from the peaceful and safe refuge of time with the Lord.  Intellectually and spiritually, I KNOW that this is a recipe for disaster.  I’ve been there before.  Lack of connection with the Lord through the reading of His Word and in prayer, will lead to powerless teaching and lack of ability to hear Him when He desires to speak to me.  I saw it coming, but it took a Frankenstorm to get my attention. 

For the last week, without TV or internet connection to distract me, without ministry responsibilities to prepare for, I have spent some wonderful time with the Lord and regained my bearings.  

And guess what, He still speaks to me, so long as I take the time to listen.  His power is back as well!  

So, I thank you Lord:

·        For Frankenstorms that focus me back on you
·        For the lack of TV and internet to distract me from you
·        For the blessedness of knowing that YOUR power source is always available –  I just need to plug in!
·        For reminding me that YOU are the source of life and joy – no storm, no lack   of creature comforts can EVER take that away
·        For speaking “peace” in the midst of our storm – with your words, your presence, your comfort, your reminder that spiritual things are infinitely more important than temporal.

Thank you for your faithfulness to keep this particular promise:  

“For we know that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.”  Romans 8:28

 

YES INDEED, THE LORD STILL SPEAKS. . . .

I have a friend and sister in Christ whose name is Jennifer.  I won’t tell you her age but I will tell you that we are both women “of a certain age”, looking at fewer days ahead of us than those that have already passed.  

 Jennifer has always impressed me as a woman who LOVES life!  She seems always to be up, seeing the glass half full, seizing the day.  I love that about her.  She’s a woman with lots of life left in her and great enthusiasm for living it – and that’s exactly the kind of woman I also want to be in these golden years.  I "get" her!

You would never know it to look at her but due to a genetic disorder, Jennifer is in need of a kidney transplant.  I’ve known this for some time, as has everyone else in our church.  She is already on the list for a potential deceased donor, however this list is very long, and the possibility of receiving a donor this way can take 5 or more years.   

A couple of months ago, Jennifer was told that she had only 6 more months before she would need to go on dialysis.  The best time for someone in need of a kidney to have a transplant is BEFORE they go on dialysis, so Jennifer's time was running out.  At the urging of her daughters, she posted a link on Facebook inviting readers to consider becoming live donors.  She wasn’t pressuring anyone to do this for HER, just simply putting it out there and waiting to see.

I read her post.  I’ve had several surgeries myself and, I’m ashamed to say, because I know what’s involved, I wasn’t thinking at all of lining up to volunteer for this one!  But the Lord had other plans for me!

I've said this before when people have described me as "religious".  I'm NOT religious, I have a personal relationship with the amazingly wonderful Most High God, Creator of the Universe, Father of the Lord Jesus Christ.  I have found that He communicates with His children in unexpected ways – primarily through the Bible, but sometimes with His still small voice.  This time around, He was tugging at my heart in such a way that I knew it was His “voice” I was hearing.  He didn’t so much say, “I want you to do this”, as He did just keep bringing it to my mind.  

If you have never had the Lord speak to you in this way, then you might find that weird.  I do not.  The Lord clearly wanted me to pay more attention to this “invitation” of His to participate in something He was doing, so He would NOT let me dismiss that Facebook message. 

 I found myself awake at night thinking through whether or not I could do it.  I have had surgeries, but I’m not afraid of them.  In fact my experiences with surgery, including cancer surgery, were all so positive from a spiritual perspective that in a way, I longed to experience that kind of total dependence on the Lord once again.  During those occasions, I KNEW the Lord was with me.  It was His peace I was experiencing in the midst of an anxiety producing situation.  It was He who was with me during the recovery period, giving me strength long before I expected it. Best of all, He gave me so many opportunities to encourage others and share with them what He was doing THROUGH the experience.  I can remember after the first surgery for the removal of a lump on my thyroid saying, “I’d gladly have surgery all over again if I could only know the presence of the Lord in that close, intimate way, once more.”

So, I followed that “still small voice” of God, and checked out the link on living donors.  What I discovered was that the very first step to take to see if you would be a compatible donor is to have the same blood type as the recipient.  Wouldn't hurt to go that far, right?  Well, Jennifer and I “just happened” to both be 0+.  Couldn’t ignore THAT “coincidence”, right?

Next step, a cross-match.  I traveled into New York City to Columbia Presbyterian Hospital to have 12 vials of blood taken.  In order for us to be a perfect match, Jennifer and I would have to match in every single point of this blood test.  Considering that Jennifer and I are not related – except as sisters in Christ – it was a leap for joy moment to discover that we matched, in every way!   

When Jennifer called to tell me, my response was: “Well, of course!”, because I am so convinced that the Lord is doing the leading.  Jennifer and I were like two kids on Christmas morning when we shared that news together! 

With this clear direction from the Lord, I pursued the next step.  On Monday of this past week I went back into the city for a kidney function test, an EKG and a chest X ray and everything came back GOOD.  Another round of celebrating with Jennifer and a plan to take yet another step – more blood work and a consult with a nephrologist.

Jennifer tells me that she knows a lot of people going through this kidney transplant situation and none of them has ever heard of our kind of “found a kidney donor in a week”, sort of situation.   Another reason to believe it is the Lord moving us along.

Before you start thinking that I'm some kind of super saint, let me set the record straight.  Jennifer and I are two very ordinary women – one in need of a kidney, one with a kidney to give.  We are in NO way super women or supernatural saints.  However, we DO belong to a super and supernatural, great God, who privileges us with opportunities just like this so that we might magnify HIS greatness.

Our request is that those of you who are prayer warriors hold us up in this adventure of faith.  But whatever you do, please don’t elevate us to the status of super saints!

Rejoice with us over what the Lord is doing, what He will do, and all the ways He will glorify Himself in this.  Ask us about that, because that is what we really WANT to share with you for the glory and majesty and honor of the Lord! 

Yes, the Lord still speaks today.  Jennifer and I can testify to that!  

And the headlines read. . . . .

I was listening to the radio this morning when the speaker told this story:

It was August 1926 when the funeral took place in NYC.  One hundred thousand people were estimated to have lined the streets and crowd the entrance to the funeral home.  The ensuing scene was described in the newspapers as a “madhouse”.  NYC police officers were deployed to restore order and there were even reports of suicides among the despondent mourners.

So whose funeral was this?  It was the funeral of then movie legend Rudolf Valentino, who died of complications after surgery for a ruptured ulcer at the age of 31.  

Not long ago I heard of the death of a “legend” of a different sort. This person was not at all famous by worldly standards.  She didn’t live the lavish life style of the rich and famous, as Valentino did.  There were no throngs to follow her while she lived and no hordes of mourners at her death.  Although I don’t have firsthand experience, I’m sure there was no need at all for police to restore order and no one would have been inclined to end his or her life because this woman had come to the end of hers.  There were no headlines announcing her passing.

So who was this woman whose passing was noted by a few but whose life and way of living made her a “legend” to all who had the privilege to meet her?  Her name was Miss Moxey and if you have visited this blog spot before you will remember her name.

I met Miss Moxey three years ago at All Saints Aids Camp in the Bahamas on my very first missions trip with our church’s senior high students.  Not wanting to intrude, I never did ask her how she came to be at All Saints, but I found out two years later on my second trip when I overheard someone else asking her.  She was not an AIDS sufferer but the victim of a hit and run accident that left her physically disabled.  She found herself at the camp when her family could not care for her themselves.  I never did find out how long she had been a resident, but I know it had been for some years.

Miss Moxey made an impression right from the start.  While the other residents tended to be quiet and private, this tiny woman had the capacity, with expansive gestures of her arms and hands, to make you feel abundantly welcome in the cramped quarters of her cabin.  In that way she was most experienced in practicing hospitality, although she had little by way of material possessions to share.  The senior high students and I, responding to her extravagant welcome, squeezed around her, sitting on her bed, until we could give and receive hugs easily.  Miss Moxey’s sweet spirit just drew us in.  She was warm and welcoming and easy to love, but that’s only part what made her the stuff of legends for us short term missionaries.

What elevated her to legendary status was the love Miss Moxey had for Jesus.  Entering her world was like being treated to a little glimpse of heaven where love for Jesus is openly shared, hymns of praise are sung, and words of Scripture quoted and read.  Visits always consisted of reading the Bible, singing together Miss Moxey’s favorite hymns and unashamedly gushing about the greatness of Jesus.  

Miss Moxey had somehow managed, with all her limitations and trials, to do what I, without any physical limitations and with minor trials, have such difficulty doing – she had managed to be absolutely and completely content in Jesus.  I have heard someone ask the question, “If everything was stripped away from you and all you had was Jesus, would He be enough?”.  I KNOW how Miss Moxey would have answered that question!  Yes, yes, and yes!!!

We didn’t know when we visited with her last summer that that would be our last visit.  I was so saddened when I heard that she had died this July.  But I know that I was only feeling sorry for myself because Miss Moxey and the blessing of seeing her and being with her again at All Saints had ended.  

I’m not sure whether the following quote attributed to Pastor Dwight L. Moody is accurate, but I thought of Miss Moxey when I remembered it.

One day you will wake up and hear that Dwight L. Moody has died.  Don’t you believe it!  On that day I will be more alive than I have ever been!

One day this summer I woke up to hear that Miss Moxey had died, but I don’t believe it!  She may have left THIS world but because Jesus lives, so does Miss Moxey.  Leaving all that held her back, she is absolutely MORE ALIVE than she has ever been, looking into the eyes of Jesus, whom she loved and served faithfully even in her suffering.  She is undoubtedly singing, quoting Scripture and livening up heaven with her praise!  

And I can hear her too, saying: “Sure enough!”

Thank you Lord for allowing me the privilege of knowing one of Your legends.  May I spend my life pointing others to you the way Miss Moxey did.

And Miss Moxey, after the face of Jesus, yours will be one of those I’m longing to see!  

Welcome home!

CONVICTED ONCE AGAIN. . . .

A few months ago some friends and I began a book club.  We’ve read through both fiction and non-fiction books and have had a grand time sharing our thoughts about them.  We are currently reading, The Hole in Our Gospel, by Richard Stearns, president of World Vision U.S.  

The author explains his reason for writing his book in this way:

“This book asks the question, What if?  What if each of us decided with renewed commitment to truly embrace the good news, the whole gospel, and demonstrate it through our lives – not even in big ways, but in small ones?  What if we each said to God, ‘Use me; I want to change the world’? “

Using his own personal story, the stories of many people from across the world, and a host of tough to take statistics, he seeks to raise our sensitivity to the issues facing the world’s poor – war, drought, hunger, disease and it’s debilitating effect, lack of resources, opportunity, education and exploitation – that effects so many, so that we might become part of the solution.

Truthfully, reading and discussing this book wasn’t my suggestion.  I already suspected what would happen because my husband Jim and I had begun reading the book together last year while we were on the road on vacation.  Although we only read through about half of it, it was already convicting to me!  I wasn’t sure I was ready for round 2!  With friends to keep me accountable, I knew I wouldn’t be able to let the book’s message go in one ear and out the other!  I was going to be prompted to take some kind of action.  And sure enough, that’s exactly what happened.

 Last week we covered part 3 of the questions at the end of the book.  We shared some things we had done for some of the less fortunate people whose lives had crossed ours and about the kinds of things that stirred our hearts to action. We talked a lot about how complacent we could be about the needs of people far away once their images were no longer flashing in front of us on a TV screen.  We talked a bit about what we could be doing to make a difference.

Honestly, I was feeling badly.  Talking alone didn’t do a thing to move me out of my complacency.   As I thought about it, the Lord brought someone to mind. Two weeks previously I had had a conversation with a woman.  Well actually I mostly listened, because she was having a horrific time on a variety of levels.  My heart went out to her.  I thought of her on and off over the weeks before our book club meeting.  I thought, I really need to call her, but I did nothing.

The night of our book club meeting, after finishing the discussion questions, I was struck by the section entitled, Take Action.   There the author encouraged us to reflect on when we had been the answer to someone’s prayers and then to make a list to complete the phrase:  “I am an answer to someone’s prayer every time I. . . . .”

Now that is the kind of assignment I love because it takes an idea and forces me to make it practical.  I immediately set to work on my list.  Here’s what I came up with:

I am an answer to someone’s prayer every time I . . .

• ·         Invest in getting to know their children and in praying for them.

• ·         Reach out to encourage and pray for another woman – in person, on line, or on the phone.

• ·         Teach God’s Word to adults or children and make it so interesting that they come to love God and His Word in a deeper way.

• ·         Gather women together to pray or study God’s Word.

• ·         Say yes to serving the Lord where He has called me.

• ·         Plan something at night for working women.

• ·         Plan a women’s event to bring women together.

• ·         Choose to attend an event, not for myself, but to minister to someone else.

• ·         Point out someone’s giftedness and encourage them to apply it in serving the Lord.

• ·         Help someone to see beyond their challenging circumstances to envision what the Lord might be doing through them.

• ·         Plan something to get our neighbors together.

• ·          “Hear” the Spirit speak – and I obey.

• ·         Invest in mentoring younger women in the next generation as they seek to know and serve the Lord.

• Participate in a food drive.

• Tutor a single mom in math. 

• Take an English as a Second Language training class

As I worked my way through my list, patting my back on my sensitivity all the way, I kept thinking of the woman.  That’s when it struck me.  How can I begin to experience God’s heart toward hurting people in the world at large, thinking how wonderfully sensitive I am, when I can so easily ignore those hurting people right in front of me?  The ones with faces I recognize, families I know, hurts that they’ve personally shared with me.  

Truthfully, it shamed me.  So I wrote another list.

I refuse to be an answer to someone’s prayer every time I . . .

• ·         Recognize an opportunity to talk about Jesus and then don’t.

• ·         Listen to a woman’s need and then walk away, without praying, and without following up.

• ·         Hear of a need at church that I can easily meet, but don’t want to.

• ·         Read or hear about the needs of people across the world, but dismiss them because they’re far away.

• ·         Think, “Why doesn’t someone do something”, but not see myself as the “someone”.

• ·         Think only locally and never globally.

• ·         Think only of my church, my family, my friends, but never about God’s church around the world.

• ·         Choose my own comfort, space, convenience, SELF over others when I can easily do something tangible to help.

• ·         Choose to stay in the comfort zone of my church and with other Christians and never get involved in anything outside that world.

• ·         Go about my life as if it’s all about me.

• ·         Choose to follow up with the “easy” people and situations while refusing to minister to the challenging people, or in long term situations.

• ·         Only THINK about someone in need but DO nothing.

I finally called that woman and she was so grateful that someone had thought of her.  Such a small thing to me, but such a great blessing to her.  It was so good to be taken down a peg - more like several pegs.

I’m not looking forward to finishing The Hole in Our Gospel, but I need to finish.  The ONLY way I’m going to change is if the Lord convicts me - often - with my failure to live up to the gospel right here in front of me, while continuing to pray the words of Bob Pierce, the founder of World Vision, for a local and global heart like that of God’s: 

“Let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God.”