THE WINDS OF LIFE CHANGE ARE BLOWING

The Lord is up to something in my life.  I recognize the signs.  He's worked in this way in my life before. The winds of change are blowing. I have that sense that the Lord has something different in store, but hasn’t yet decided to reveal all.  I’m in “quietly waiting” mode, drawing closer to Him and waiting for Him to make the next move. 

Beginning last summer I was sensing it was time to let go of my involvement in Vacation Bible School. I have always loved the non-stop energy of VBS as well as the experience of working together as the Body of Christ – young and old alike – to reach our community’s children with the love of Jesus.  VBS has often been the highlight of the ministry year for me – but recently my heart hasn’t been in it.

For the last several years I’d been responsible, with the help of others, for planning the service projects.  In the past we’ve made a variety of things – a different one for each of the 5 days of VBS.  Some years it was no sew blankets for a pregnancy center, trail mix for our town’s firefighters, cards for military personnel or a local nursing home, collecting flip flops for our high school students to take to the Bahamas on their mission’s trip, among others.  But last year, my enthusiasm was flagging.  The planning and preparation for all that, which begins at least a month before, was overwhelming, and for the first time I thought, “Maybe this will be my last VBS.”  But then the week was so much fun, such a blessing to work together with my church family that by the end I was glad I hadn’t turned the opportunity down.

And then came this year.  I couldn’t face the task at all.  I was tired from a busy year of ministry, so tired that I couldn’t imagine gearing up for the excitement of a busy and energetic week of VBS when I was already worn out.  At first I thought I’d just do it anyway, but then I had to face reality – I really wasn’t up to it this year.

Last year I was also all set to accompany our senior high youth on a missions trip that was scheduled to leave just two days after the end of VBS.  I didn’t realize just how tired I was until that trip was cancelled due to a weather related state of emergency in the state where we would be serving.  I was surprised by how relieved I was!  Until the cancellation, I didn’t realize how exhausted I was.

Since I had raised my own expenses last year and the trip was cancelled, I was technically all set to go on this year’s mission trip, but again, when the time came to commit myself I knew my heart just wasn’t in it.  Suddenly, it seemed like more energy to go than I could muster.  I love missions trips and counted it such a privilege to have been on three, all of them AFTER I turned 60!  But this time, my heart and my body were screaming, “NO!”

I turned 66 in February, so maybe I’m just not up for the energy required to work with 120 kids every day in VBS, or the profuse sweating and labor intensive work of a missions trip in which the primary emphasis is on building things and tearing them down. 

Even as I write that, I’m thinking, “Duh, this is a no brainer, Dot!  You’re 66, of course you don’t have the energy for that!”   Okay, so maybe I just have to admit that age IS at least part of the reason I’m tired and not up to that level of intensity!  I hate having to admit that!  In my mind I’m still somewhere in my 40s!

I know that while the Lord has been showing me that maybe it’s time to let go of those specific activities, He’s also indicating that some new and exciting ministry prospects are still well within my energy level! 

For example, this year I took some training classes our town library offers in how to teach English as a second language.  Armed with a few classes and a plethora of materials the library makes available to tutors, I have been blessed to have the Lord bring Eri into my life to study English.  Eri, a lovely 30 something Japanese woman with two small children, and her husband Kaz, have become real friends.  They come to our church weekly, sometimes we go to lunch or to one another’s homes, I babysit the children now and then, and once a week Eri and I meet to practice English.  Wow, what a blessing this has been and one I didn’t anticipate when I ended VBS last summer.  Eri and I are planning to resume our English tutoring again next fall.

Then back in January I began working for Mary Ann.  Mary Ann was a 69 year old woman, the mother of one of my daughter’s friends.  She had just gotten out of the hospital and was battling both leukemia and emphysema.  I visited weekly to do her food shopping, occasionally take her to her doctor’s appointments and then usually stay to have lunch.  What began as an employer/employee relationship became a friendship, and so when Mary Ann died suddenly after another hospitalization in April, I was sad and missed the blessing of seeing her every week.

It was then that the Lord began to plant an idea in my mind that I am soon to pursue with another set of training sessions.  I’m hoping to become a hospice volunteer.  Back in 2006 when my mom had a stroke she was placed in a hospice home in Florida.  I was so impressed with the care Mom received there that it was always in the back of my mind that maybe one day I’d volunteer, and so when one day recently I saw an advertisement on our church’s bulletin board advertising training classes, the Lord spoke to my heart to follow up.  So, Lord willing, I will attend those 4 training classes later this month and hopefully have another “Mary Ann” in my future to visit and minister to.

And then there's that thing the Lord is doing to change my thinking from: "I never want to move to Florida" to bring me around to this kind of thinking:  "WHEN we get to Florida. . . ."

Oh, and of course, there’s that kidney donor thing that’s still on my horizon.  All of my tests have indicated a GO for donating one of my healthy kidneys, and so now Jennifer, who'll receive it, and I are just waiting on the Lord’s perfect timing for the exchange to take place.

It’s funny how hard it has been to have to face the relentless advance of age, but all I have to do is write about it and suddenly I see it – the Lord isn’t really finished with me yet.  The doors of VBS and missions trips are closing, but other new doors, equally exciting, though less physically demanding, are opening. 

Wow, You’re amazing Lord.  I wouldn’t trade the excitement of being on some new adventure with You for anything!  Thank You for continually opening new doors I didn’t even know existed, until another one closed.